Arguing is a natural part of any relationship—both healthy and unhealthy ones. You are bound to have disagreements with your significant other. When puppy love fades, you are left with the raw and real reality of who that person is and flaws your relationship may have.
While couples who are unhappy may argue about anything and everything they can think of, research shows all happy couples have something in common. They tend to only argue about issues that can reach a solution.
A study was done by Family Process in which couples in their early 30’s and couples in their 70’s claiming to be happily married spoke about what their qualms were. They were asked to scale what they considered their biggest issues to what they found to be insignificant in the relationship.
Subjects like intimacy, communication, and finances made the list while things like jealousy and religion fell at the wayside. The study showed a very strong likelihood these couples focused on issues that could be fixed rather than those that are more fluid in nature.
That concluded that happier couples are more likely to come up with successful ways to end the conflict and keep their relationships complacent. It is a matter of choosing your battles wisely and being willing to compromise to find common ground.
What may be surprising is that research shows men are more likely to benefit from marriage. Women are more susceptible to the effects of a bad marriage. In both genders, happier marriages reduce risks for health issues like heart issues, cancer, and depression.
Healthy relationships, on the other hand, produce more body and mind-conscious behaviors. You may be wondering who is more likely to have a healthy relationship and if you are one of them.
Science has determined—it could be in your genes. That’s right, your key to happiness could depend on your genetic makeup, making you more or less likely to have a relationship that feels kismet.
Happy couples tend to carry a particular strain of genes that are linked to higher levels of empathy and emotional evenness. Does this mean not all people are destined to find a solid, long-lasting relationship? Dr. Bella DePaulo is on the singles side here.
She claims, “All of these unsuccessful attempts to make married people look better should be more than enough to keep other scholars and journalists from jumping off the deep end with their fortune cookie proclamations, ‘Get married, get happier.’ But sadly, they aren’t.”
So, she isn’t convinced by the scientific studies claiming marriage makes people happier. She leans more towards the benefits that married couples get over singles, making life less stressful, as playing a direct role in this. The benefits of marriage create fewer stressors, making it a monetary gain more so than an emotional one.
It varies drastically from person to person. At the end of the day, only you can decide if it is your spouse that adds to your lust for life.